I’m in the basement of my grandparents old house, I remember the carpets, the wood paneling and the brown brick fireplace. My grandpa and I walk out through the walkout, through the backyard, through a row of trees, over some train tracks and into a park. Eerily… although I can recall all details of this place, I supposedly never saw that house as they moved out before I was born!
I am so excited to hear that my best friend is moving back into the city. You know, before she left we didn’t talk all that much, but whenever we did it was like we had just seen each other the day before. I never realized how much I needed her and would miss her until after she moved away. There’s a big difference between a relationship with someone in person vs through technology.
I can’t wait for you to come back dear!
Recently I am discovering how to incorporate things I used to love into my life. Like, I used to play video games and watch anime a lot. In fact, I think the days of sitting with my friends in the cafeteria or visiting the nearby anime and collectibles shop were some of the most interesting and happiest times. I had so many friends and I was true to myself, nothing else mattered!
Then of course, we all grew up. Schools changed, people moved, and here we are today. In university I think I lost that part of myself, no maybe it was earlier? Either way, I buried the things that I loved and in that process I think that I became a less friendly and happy person.
But of course, happiness should be what we all aim for, right? I have discovered that there are actually many people out there with the same interests as myself. I have friends who love makeup, and friends who love video games. I’ve even been invited to next years convention, who would have imagined??
So I am currently making one of those “Let’s Play” series on Youtube. Assuming that I can get all the video stuff edited properly. It’s my first time doing such a thing. I chose Pokemon Heart Gold. Those videos seem to be quite popular on Youtube to my surprise! I am doing it just for fun, if it becomes popular I might try to raise money for charity with it.
Either way, I will be adding links up on this blog soon. I want to personalize it a bit more, right now I downloaded the template and sort of left it where it was. I did add Disqus though, I am quite proud of that.
So please friends, lets discuss!
My picture in my last post I took myself on my iPhone 3GS with the Instagram app. Now that I am in between phones, I’ve gone back to my old iPhone and been rediscovering some apps. I don’t know if I could live without Instagram for the moment. Somehow it makes the world look more like how I can feel inside.
I recently had my birthday, and it left me with a lot of reflection.
I’m not sure that I’m happy with my life the way it is… this fall has been full of bad news and worse feelings. My mom’s wedding, her incessant demands for my help yet her lack of reciprocation. Big changes happened at work and I’ve been working long shifts, overtime, never more than a day off at a time.
My boyfriend got called away to work in NYC… it was hard enough with him an hour away in TO. His phone broke… we rely on email and Skype phone… but not seeing someone in person for such a long time helps you learn to be without them… I don’t want that.
My birthday was full of melancholy… on the day of I worked… my own mother couldn’t even say “Happy Birthday” until I reminded her. And since then it has just been work and more work.
Sometimes if anybody notices how worn out I feel, how worn out I am. I want nothing more than to just be alone in my room, in my bed, without being bothered by anybody, free to go whenever I please.
I need more freedom from my life!
Means “heavenly flowers” in Hawaiian…
I find names so interesting. People sometimes ask me what I would name my children or what names I like, so I’ve decided to start doing some research. :)